Barrier 4: Basing Personal Security On Staying Calm

Traveling through this life, you may sometimes experience more anxiety and insecurity than you prefer. If, however, you attempt to find an anxiety-free way through life--in a futile attempt to feel secure--ironically you will experience even more anxiety and insecurity. Reason: You avoid learning and participating in events that provide for the development of greater security. Since eMOTION is constantly in MOTION, basing any sense of security on naturally unstable feelings is in and of itself insecure.

STEPS TO REMOVING THE BARRIER

Think of times you felt insecure but in fact had every reason to feel quite secure. Example: Tad frequently felt anxious and insecure during graduate school, even though he ended up receiving straight A's.

Remind yourself of the importance of doing something constructive regardless of how you feel.

Ask yourself:: "If I'm going to feel uncomfortable for awhile, would I rather feel uncomfortable and get something done, or would I rather feel uncomfortable and get nothing done."

Practice doing constructive things, even though you do not initially feel comfortable doing them. Result: The more you do so, the less uncomfortable you will feel, and if you continue to feel uncomfortable for awhile, at least you have accomplished something constructive.
Look for things you can do to bring greater happiness and security, even though they may not make you feel good immediately. For example, exercise regularly; eat moderately; get sufficient rest; involve yourself in church, civic, academic, or professional activities; read a good book; visit a friend; etc.
For additional information, please see Central Principle 6: "Personal Security."

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Anxiety Chapater Overview

Copyright @ John R. Fishbein, Ph.D. 2000 All Rights Reserved